 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
I actually just did that about a week and a half ago. The guy was really into me and I felt bad leading him on. I thought about it for three days and finally came to the decision that it had to be done. It ended up being harder for me than it was for him.
There's no really way not to hurt his feelings. If he's into you, losing you is not going to be easy for him any way you slice it. You just have to be genial and polite. Don't trash talk him to your friends or anyone. And if you value having his friendship, tell him. You won't be friends right away, but eventually it'll blow over.
--Posted by lovemypod
10:15PM EST 05/13/08
|
Have Guts
Don't be a wimp and take the easy way out by telling him with technology--at least tell him to his face. Be as nice as you can about it, but don't be angry if he gets upset. His reaction will be his reaction, and there's not much you can do about that.
--Posted by chirptweep
07:39PM EST 05/11/08
|
On The Other Hand...
I've been through this being the other person. In this case, your boyfriend. It will hurt him no matter what, but the sooner you do it, less it will hurt.
My boyfriend took over a month to break up with me. During that time, I could see that there was no sparkling in his eyes when he was around me, that he didn't want me to go over his place anymore, that he was just staying with me for pity. I could feel all that, because we dated for nine months before we fall apart. I spent the entire last month we were together crying. In the end, I was the one that had to break up with him because he just couldn't bring himself to do it.
After we broke up, it hurt a lot. But I would have saved a month of tears if he had broken up with me as soon as he realized he didn't want me to date him anymore.
So just do it. There's no easy way. And after that, don't walk away, but still don't try to be best friends with him. It would be nice if you let him put things in order in his mind before you two try to become friends again.
--Posted by ritokitax
05:12PM EST 05/11/08
 |
|
Don't Pussyfoot Around With Him
However you do it, it's probably gooing to hurt him anyway, so just do it. Tell him you really care about him as a friend and want to stay friends with him, but that you don't want to be his girlfriend anymore (for whatever reason that may be). Also, he might need some time before he can be just friends with you.
--Posted by lily6232
11:36AM EST 05/11/08
|
Be Honest
There's no right way to break someone's heart, especially with someone you care about so much. The "best" way to break up with someone (in my opinion) is to be extremely honest. Tell him the reasons why you're doing it, talk about your feelings and about what you want to happen (eg. stay friends, etc.)
--Posted by fosterfan2006
08:12PM EST 05/10/08
|
He Needs To Know
It may seem like the best way to keep him from hurting is to stay with him. But in reality, if you don't want to be with him, you have to tell him that. The sooner you do it, the less heartache it will be for him. If you really care about his feelings, you need to break up with him ASAP.
I was on the other end once. A guy I was crazy about finally cheated on me and broke up with me. He said that he hadn't had feelings for me for months, but he didn't know how to tell me.
It was a really, really horrible feeling. I can't even describe it.
--Posted by mary-kate452
06:28PM EST 05/09/08
|
Don't Lead Him On
I'm sorry, but there's really no way to break up with him without hurting him. However, you can do it in a nicer way so it may not be as bad. Just don't stay with him just because you don't want to hurt him--that's leading him on and would hurt more in the longrun.
--Posted by dancehalldrug
04:55PM EST 05/09/08
|
Let Him Go...
I recently went through the same thing. I was dating a guy for a really long time, and had no feelings for him anymore, except as friends.
There's no way of doing it without hurting him, its just the way it is. You have to sit him down, talk to him, tell him how you feel, and that you really want to break up.
It's not worth it to hang on to a guy you have no feelings for just because you don't want to hurt him. He'll eventually get over it, and then maybe you can be friends. Maybe not right away, but he will come around.
--Posted by cigarettesex
11:29AM EST 05/09/08
|
He'll Get Used to It...
I agree, it will be painful no matter what. It's best if you let him know that you think he's a great person, but a romantic relationship with him just isn't what you want with him, and explain why that is.
Give him a while to get used to the breakup. It will probably take some time to be able to talk and hang out again normally. I just had to do this a few months ago; it was hard to do and he and I didn't speak properly for almost two weeks, but we're doing fine now.
--Posted by swtchbldsymphny
11:08AM EST 05/09/08
|
Still Be Friends
There's really no way to do it without hurting him. The best thing to do is to get him alone and explain to him exactly how you feel.
Let him know that you still care for him and would still like to be friends, but you have no romantic feelings left. He may not be ready to face you right away, so give him some space and time to heal.
--Posted by doll_parts06
09:43AM EST 05/09/08
|
|
|
 |
|
