I have a major problem with criticism. I criticize myself about my behavior, grades, looks, weight and how I treat other people. I criticize others in my head when they do things better or worse than me. Is there something I can do to stop being so mean and pessimistic?
We're our own worst enemies. I used to do that, but I figured that in the end it doesn't do anything but hurt my self-esteem, which I didn't need.
Wear a rubber band and every time you find yourself saying/thinking something critical (that's undeserved), pop it. It'll remind you that undeserved criticism hurts. --Posted by hislilarmybrat 10:04PM EST 12/08/06
Ask Yourself
Why do you criticize yourself so much? It could be that you're suffering from a self-esteem problem. The next time you feel the need to dump on yourself, step back and ask, "OK, what did I do good in this situation?" Focus on that. True, you might have made a mistake, but if no one else noticed, why should you? --Posted by whatever_it_is 01:31PM EST 12/08/06
You're only human
I've found the most common thing with pessimists/perfectionists are that they tend to forget we're all human and make mistakes.
I am a lot like this myself, always getting on people (inside my head only, though) for not being pretty enough, for not being funny enough, for not being PERFECT enough.
But when you look really into it, I find the imperfections are what I love most about some people.
If you let go of the super high standards, you'll find yourself appreciating everyone in a whole new way and your self-esteem, self-image, and all of that will go up. --Posted by trinity-hope 06:10PM EST 11/10/06
Take action.
If you don't like something about yourself, do something about it. It doesn't have to be anything drastic. Just set a realistic goal for yourself. For example, if you don't like your science mark, take more time studying or pre-read the chapter before the next day. Take notes, re-read your notes, quiz yourself, etc. Stick to your goal and tell yourself inspiring things to keep you going.
Once you achieve it, reward yourself. It can just be a little something to indulge in after all your hard work. And when you criticize others in your head, say something nice and encouraging to them out loud. If you keep at it, you will change. --Posted by esmerelva 10:17AM EST 07/17/06
Get involved
You need to get involved in something at your school or in your community. It will take your focus off trying to beat other people and looking down on yourself. You'll be involved with something that helps others; and that will make you feel so much better.
Try writing down your good attributes on a piece of paper. When you feel low look at it or think about it so you can see how wonderful YOU are! --Posted by drkloudgrl 05:19PM EST 07/16/06
Wow. Just like me.
I'm the same way. I'm obsessively critical, and it bothers me, too.
But I write.
I write everything I'm thinking and feeling. I keep a journal, just for that kind of stuff.
Anytime something is bothering you, write it down. It helps me, and it might help you. --Posted by hermeown 07:04PM EST 07/14/06
Hmm...
I have the exact same problem and I followed a method that really helped me.
First of all, get a notebook (or some paper) and a pencil. Write down all the good things about you that you can think of--your looks, personality, anything you can think of. Then, write down one thing that you don't feel you're good at; for example, improving your math grade--and work at it until you improve it. Then pick a new one. This will help you improve upon yourself and soon you will realize you have many wonderful and unique traits that make you awesome! --Posted by nightlark 08:19PM EST 03/28/06
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