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  you are here  >>> FIND OUT > help me heather > sucky emotions  
  related topics  >>>  being yourself  |  body image  |  sucky emotions    

 


 
  Dear Heather,

I constantly worry about what people think of me, particularly about my race. I was on Facebook and found supremacist groups (hate groups). I tried not to cry, but I couldn't help it. I just couldn't believe there are still people out there that say these hateful remarks. I know in life everyone will come across an ignorant person, but I don't know how to deal with it.

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Hi.

It's really disheartening to see that there are still people who hold on to racist beliefs, and even more distressing to see them using such popular forums as Facebook to encourage or support these beliefs in others.

Since these postings don't just make you angry, they go to the core of your self-esteem, you may need to find ways to feel more confident about and accepting of your race.

Psychologist Natalie Humphrey, Ph.D. says, "There is a large body of research that has found when people have a stronger racial identity, they are better able to cope with racism. They are also more likely to live happier lives and make better decisions when faced with racism."

In other words, when you feel better about yourself, you're better able to deal with such mental assaults. Allow yourself to have positive experiences that will make you feel more comfortable about your race. Dr. Humphrey suggests that learning more about your family history through relatives and learning about your cultural history through museum exhibits and books may help you to see your race in a broader context.

If you don't tend to socialize with people of your own race, try to spend some more time among this group. Finding a mentor, someone whom you respect and can talk to about such things, could also help because it's likely that they've faced similar or even more dramatic circumstances.

I hope you will find the support you need to deal with such offensive situations, if and when they occur in the future.

Take care,

 
   
 
 

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